It’s been a beautiful thing to experience the richness, uniqueness and power that is within storytelling. I believe there has been a tangible shift in rising stories within our community these past few years that has been a catalyst for more leaves extended and seats being filled. For me personally, it’s been a gift to resonate with words from all sides of the triad that reinforces the truth that we are better together by lifting others.
These past few months have been filled with experiences shared, reflections made, and wider space for the marginalized to be heard. If I were to give one theme that would encompass what I feel happening among us is resilience. For one to possess resilience, it is thought that someone would know how to move forward in spite of setbacks, obstacles or limitations presented to them. Resilience can take many shapes and forms since it is internal work, but the ripple effect is tangible for each of us.
One ripple I experienced was the anticipation and aftermath of the Red Table Talk episode that focused on transracial adoption from the experience and truth of a transracial adoptee, Angela Tucker. She carried both vulnerability and courage with her as she took her seat at the round table recognizing that she would be the first in this space to shed light on the experiences of a marginalized group. As she shared her internal complexities I found my own story adding more words to give definition and meaning that hadn’t been there before. It also was clear even though we share the role of transracial adoptee, we experienced it very differently. This episode brought about all sides of the triad in a fresh way that hopefully brought insight into the lives of those touched by adoption.
Upon finishing the episode, I was left with many different thoughts and emotions. Feeling discouraged that once again the story of an adoptee is misunderstood or misconstrued; that when someone shares the tension of racial identity is being taken as a weakness reinforces our otherness and the gratefulness our story was given space to be heard. As I began to connect with trusted friends about what I was feeling, their vulnerability of what they observed and were processing reinforced my gratitude for the deep relationships I have built within the triad. This community has provided a space for me to be my truest self and how freeing it can feel to hold that as I continue to navigate my own story.
I find myself immersed in this community by the accounts I follow and the continuing dialogue among members of the triad about real-life experiences and decision making which leads me to forget that this awareness isn’t on the minds of our greater community. The comments left on the episode page were filled with layers of questions, disbelief, and in parts anger. It was a very clear reminder to me that it is important that I stand firm on my truths and know that there will always be a risk in inviting others into the complexities of my story.
If I could give an image to what I see our community becoming, it is this: we are continuing to thread a colorful triad tapestry of resilience as we share our risen stories, full of diverse experiences and differing perspectives that are interwoven together. Maya Angelou gently and powerfully reminds us that “we all should know that diversity makes for a rich tapestry and we must understand that all the threads of the tapestry are equal in value no matter what their color.” As we step back and see this grand intricate piece being created, may we see that our own thread brings a needed piece to this tapestry.
WRITTEN BY SHARDAY DUFRESNE
Sharday is a wife to one and mom to two residing along the southern coast of California. She is an early riser, daily coffee connoisseur, interior design enthusiast, and lover of all things fall. She is a transracial adoptee who is inviting that voice within to rise up storyteller and desires to champion and advocate for those in this triad community in hopes of adding more leaves and seats to our extended table to hear others stories rise up as well.
